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TACT VI: COLE BEASTLEY... FINALLY A REASON FOR OPTIMISM!!!
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Desperado82


Joined: 20 Feb 2010
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Location: Maryland
PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 4:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Texas_OutLaw7 wrote:
Desperado82 wrote:


Have you actually seen the Music Video? So creepy.


I have...actually kinda like it
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Desperado82


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 5:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

50 pages shy of TACT VII.
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Ace5


Joined: 22 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I typed in matts wife and this came up. I've seen some things, but this... how does he cope?




discuss.
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Desperado82


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:20 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

She needs some dental surgery...
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Texas_OutLaw7


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Though have you seen her mom? She has it going on. She's all I want.
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Ace5


Joined: 22 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 6:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Texas_OutLaw7 wrote:
Though have you seen her mom? She has it going on. She's all I want.


I've waited for so long. Stacy can't you see, you're just not the girl for me?
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acowboys62


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 7:21 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

MLB playoffs, NFL season in full swing and the NBA coming back soon. Such a great time in sports.

...for all 4 people who actually like the NBA in this world.
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HDsportsfan


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 8:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ace5 wrote:
I typed in matts wife and this came up. I've seen some things, but this... how does he cope?


discuss.


Ummm...hell no
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Tony7188


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 8:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

acowboys62 wrote:
MLB playoffs, NFL season in full swing and the NBA coming back soon. Such a great time in sports.

...for all 4 people who actually like the NBA in this world.


So... since this is the TACT thread. How about them Texas Rangers?

Keeping the new Dallas tradition proud
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Runaway Jim


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 9:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

...
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Last edited by Runaway Jim on Sun Oct 07, 2012 10:46 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Ace5


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 10:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

acowboys62 wrote:
MLB playoffs, NFL season in full swing and the NBA coming back soon. Such a great time in sports.

...for all 4 people who actually like the NBA in this world.


I am the 25%
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Matts4313


Joined: 08 Dec 2004
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 11:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

JWingate wrote:
Desperado82 wrote:
I know I'm going to get ragged on for this, but I made a cinnamon roll cake Thursday night.

Frickin' amazing. Made a great breakfast the last two days and goes great with the morning coffee.


....Yesterday I killed a deer with my bare hands...sorry needed to man up the thread again.


I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope.

The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it.

After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me.

I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.

I took a step towards it...it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and then received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope.

That deer EXPLODED.

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope and with some dignity.

A deer -- no chance.

That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined.

The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many other animals.

A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope.

I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand....kind of like a squeeze chute.

I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist.

Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head --almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.

The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.

I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it.

While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago that, when an animal -- like a horse --strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.

This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.

The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.

Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head.

I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

So now I know why when people go deer hunting they bring a rifle with a scope to sort of even the odds.
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plan9misfit wrote:

If we're able to go 11-5 or better, then Garrett and his staff deserve to be coaches of the damned decade.
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Matts4313


Joined: 08 Dec 2004
Posts: 38043
Location: Cowboys Forum ROH Class of 12
PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 11:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Desperado82 wrote:
Texas_OutLaw7 wrote:
So I am the only one here who doesn't bake? Like I tried to make cookies the other day and they came out mushy so I re-baked them and then they became burnt. Laughing

Whatever. I will out grill any of you!


Hey, soft cookies are the best. I like 'em almost doughy.

Speaking of grilling...I've been craving a good, juicy steak with a couple beers...


Excellent.. its only time until women will be added to that list. Wink
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plan9misfit wrote:

If we're able to go 11-5 or better, then Garrett and his staff deserve to be coaches of the damned decade.
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Desperado82


Joined: 20 Feb 2010
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Location: Maryland
PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 11:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Matts, I'm glad you're okay...but I'm literally laughing my [inappropriate/removed] off at that story right now
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Matts4313


Joined: 08 Dec 2004
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PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2012 11:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Desperado82 wrote:
Matts, I'm glad you're okay...but I'm literally laughing my [inappropriate/removed] off at that story right now


Laughing Laughing


I should point out that the story was pulled from the intrawebz and not a personal experience. I could not find out who to quote for the original version, almost everything is a copy of that with "anonymous" being listed as the author.
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plan9misfit wrote:

If we're able to go 11-5 or better, then Garrett and his staff deserve to be coaches of the damned decade.
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